Last couple of days....

So the last couple of days have been hard, but in some ways invigorating. I have been purging and making some changes in my new life. Trying to figure out the new me and my new life (I guess you would call it that). I have also done  more firsts in the last couple of days and I must admit I have shed so much water through tears that I honestly feel dehydrated.  I don't mean to share this as discouragement... I just think it's part of the healing process is all. I feel like I am mourning the loss of a loved one and I do need to do that to be able to heal.  I think time will help with the pain and the things I have done in the last couple of days are baby steps closer to healing. Man alive....divorce is the hardest thing I have ever had to do. I would go through my surgery again than go through this and that wasn't an easy surgery, but I have to remember... I can do hard things, but I don't have to do them alone. Sometimes easier said than done. I am so grateful for good people, good friends and most of all my family.  Last night I had some special visitors show up at my house with a little treat for me. A good friend from my ward and her children. She has experienced what I am going through and bless her heart. She is amazing. She is a good example and such a good mom!  I am grateful for their visit and for their company. It is always fun to have visitors. I was also able to talk to a good friend at work. She had such a good prospective on being single. She is amazing. Everyone is amazing!  I couldn't do it without any of you! Tonight I was able to spend time with my bug "Oaklie".  We had a lot of fun together, we ate pizza, she ate the olives off my pizza, played toys and her mommy and daddy gave me the attention I needed at that moment. My little brother helped do "honey do's" around my house and then they helped me conquer something that I didn't want to do alone. I am grateful for a loving brother and sister that so willingly help me and love me.  I never thought I would need to rely on my little brother's, but they have stepped up to the plate and I am so lucky to have them.  They are wonderful!  I am so grateful for their love and example to me in my life.   Thanks to the Bro I can watch DVD's in bed! They also helped me take a very large step forward with something... Thank you! I love you!  This little bug is the cutest thing.... She loves the toys at my house. She loves trying on my shoes. She found my lady bug slippers. They are as big as her, but she didn't care. She loved walking around in them. I love her. I am so grateful that I get to be a big part of her life. I am very lucky!

 She is sooo curious and she doesn't sit still for a minute. I can barely catch her on camera let alone look at the camera. Please don't look at my messy closet. I am "purging".  Boy has that been fun.....Not!